12/18/05, my parents' house - The other night I was listening to some music in my family's minivan while driving down the road, when suddenly an awesome song came on. It was a rendition of "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen" by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. It had guitars and piano and it rocked really hard. The only way it could have been any better is if it had vamped continuously Dream Theatre-style for about an hour and a half. This got me to thinking about some other Christmas carols like "The First Noel". What is a "noel", pray tell? The other one I thought about was "Silent Night". Does the writer of this carol really expect me to believe that Jesus slept peacefully in a feeding trough for animals that were probably making a bunch of racket around him in the cave? And where does the author of "Away in a Manger" get off saying Jesus didn't cry as a baby? That seems pretty unlikely.

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