Here's the continuation of this rather long and drawn-out story. Hope you're still awake, because some of the best stuff is yet to come.

After the getting home had been accomplished, the next task was sneaking out of home to prom with the goods that would be needed for that night. I quickly put up all my Spanish Convention stuff and changed into my suit, asking my mom to iron my nice blue dress shirt for me. Little did she know what I really had in mind...

After she finished ironing, I put the shirt on. Then, I got my band jersey, my Hawaiian shirt, my free, mail-in offer Marines sunglasses, my tie, my concert band tux bowtie, and Vox (my Spanish dictionary, who by now has a printed picture of a tux taped onto his front cover) all in my old marching band bag. Indeed, great things were positioning themselves to happen, and I was on a roll to make sure that nothing went awry. In a masterful triumph, I snuck the bag past my mother and said goodbye, then got into my dad's car to begin the festivities.

First off was Taco Bell, where some guys I know (OK, two guys) had agreed to show up and share in the pre-prom festivities. Wes was already there with his mom when I arrived, so we waiting around until the great Fattell of Mr. Fattell's site fame arrived in style ("in style" = with a very nerdy hat flung on his head, though I can't remember what it said). We all ordered and chowed down on the burritos, tacos, and other great stuff that you can order at Taco Bell. Then Wes left to see "Holes" and left me talking to Fattell, which in itself was pretty good.

I found out that you can get extra guacamole on anything you order at Taco Bell for only 25 cents extra, which will no doubt turn out to be helpful information some day. After finishing our food, I went into the bathroom to hide the band jersey and Hawaiian shirt under my dress shirt. When I came out, Fattell said it wasn't really noticeable, but I did look a little bit bulkier than usual. We had some extra time before I had to go to the prom, so we agreed to hang out at Lowe's for a little while, and maybe look at some toilets.

We looked at quite a few appliances, including a very nice shower set going for over $1000 and a urinal going for under $40. Also included were some refrigerators, tile patterns, dishwashers...you know, the usual. We also programmed one of the home security/surveillance TVs to display "crap?!" in the upper left-hand corner; that was slightly entertaining. Then, Fattell said adieu until later that night when I'd be going to First Baptist to see his wacko band play.

I went by Cameron's house next, since it was on my way to where I was going, and showed him the outfit. His mom was very impressed by the plan and stunned by the fact that few people went stag any more. Confidence was definitely getting boosted for the gag. Cameron, it turns out, was grounded from the computer and not able to perform his 8-hour computer game salute to my ultimate marching uniform plan. I departed and he wished me good luck in my endevour that night.

This is where the fun really got going. I was cruising down the interstate, music blaring, singing along (you might want to avoid hearing me sing; I like it but some may not), with only a faint idea of how to even get to where the prom was. But, nonetheless, with the help of Fattell's very vague directions I managed to get myself there; only to get jipped out of $4 for parking! A rip-off, I know, but some expenses are just necessary for a good time, I suppose. I figured with the racket I was saving by not taking a date I could afford the upper-class parking. Made sense to me, anyway.

The prom was actually pretty dull. Going towards the roundhouse where it was held, I saw Spratley riding with his date in a carriage before I went in, and my computer science teacher was running the sign-in desk. All was sweet action when I ran into Mr. Daniel himself with Bogan. I hung out with them for a few minutes, then got too cool for 'em and made the rounds saying hi to all the folks, letting them shake Vox's corner, whom I had brought inside with me. He was having a pretty good time, overall, but he was really just in it to meet chicks.

The main problem with the prom is that they played rap music. Only rap music. Which got a little bit redundant. I did get to slow dance with Laura the bassoonist, Julia the saxophone player, and even Kathy of Tito Love Story fame. All those who said that I wouldn't dance with one of the twins was proved wrong, and the B even had to stand around and look bored while I danced with his date. The other twin just stared at the ceiling while dancing with wrestler (we still haven't figured out his name).

Then, after I didn't win prom prince and a few other songs, I went into the men's bathroom. Things got crazy go nuts at this point. I took off my suit jacket and dress shirt and put on the sunglasses, and the full awesomeness of the Hawaiian shirt and band jersey began to show. I walked out of the bathroom and everybody was stunned by the craziness. A day in history had been made, for sure. Many laughs were had and I even got to take my picture with some good-looking chicks. Vox was, needless to say, jealous, but I told him to get over it.

Eventually Daniel and Bogan left, and I decided to follow them to First Baptist for the "after-prom breakfast," which was really just an excuse for some FBC kids to show off their mad band skills. First, I stalked Kimi and her boyfriend Heath to the church, driving crazily around them in the little minivan, chasing after Heath's Mitsubishi 3000GT. After I got there, I parked and waited behind my car, preparing to psyche them out. As Kimi neared the back of my car, I flung out Vox in front of her and said, "Hey pretty lady, maybe we could go eat dinner sometime, you and me..." She was scared but thought it was a pretty good trick.

The bands were pretty good, actually, and Fattell's band even played Trogdor. But I was the only person rocking out besides some other guys...pretty disappointing, actually. The food wasn't that incredible, but they did have some Mountain Dew, which I desperately needed to keep alive at this point. The Spanish Convention and prom madness were starting to wear me down, and eventually I said goodbye to all and walked back to my car. I got back home at around 1:45, got on the computer for a few minutes, and went to bed.

All in all, this was one rocking out, crazy go nuts, to the limit weekend. Things may never be this good; in fact, I doubt they ever will be. Unless I find a way to top it next year. But you'll just have to stick around to find that out. Either way, it's been nice having you around to talk to. Peace out.